Five years.

July 27th marked the fifth anniversary of my becoming ill (for those of you who don't know, I have been battling an unknown, Lupus-like disease). I didn't even remember it was "the day" until after the fact, which makes me happy. For the last five years, I have determined to keep my illness from defining who I was. It may have crushed my dreams as a musician, knocked me off my knees (quite literally) and prevented me from doing so many things I loved dearly, but it never bested me and I have been able to do plenty of normal things. Doctors said I'd never walk again, let alone run (and now I do half marathons and collegiate races). Doctors never thought I'd be able to travel easily, but I have. They weren't sure what psychological or neurological problems I'd suffer from, but God has been extremely gracious. It has been a long road and I know there will be many tough days ahead that may be filled with more doctors exams, needles and maybe even hospitals and that's okay. Back in the darkest, most miserable hours when I initially became ill, God gave me Isaiah 40:31,

...but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.

He has faithfully kept that promise. And that's why I can say this illness has been the best thing that ever happened to me. I am extremely stubborn and independent, but this illness stripped me of everything and nearly brought me to my deathbed where I was literally begging God for mercy. And by asking for help, God has given me so much.

I know I will continue to suffer from the same things in the future, but I feel I've turned a corner and can confidently say,

This illness does not lead to death. It is for the glory of God, so that the Son of God may be glorified through it.